He would've been TWO on the weekend. Only TWO. And yet we never even got that much. My heart still breaks into little pieces and the tears are still as fresh as they were 8 months ago. Each month I go through the cycle of dates, trying to fill the days and trying not to remember, as if somehow i can stop the passage of time. The guilt of going a whole day without consciously thinking of him and somehow feeling i'm betraying his memory, moving on too soon, forgetting him. I really have to stop punishing myself, but there is so much anger and guilt inside of me. I avoided the Facebook posts over the weekend, and thought i'd dodged a bullet. But i came across one just now, celebrating his siblings and remembering him and his brother, also passed, and the tears have come again like an avalanche. I really miss our little man. RIP Titan.
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